Sarah’s Story
Prior to her incarceration, Sarah’s life was defined by stability. A Business Economics major with a successful career, she had "never been a miscreant" and had no prior involvement with the legal system. This trajectory shifted when Sarah met her partner online.
The partner had two young children, and Sarah, having "never been with a partner who had kids before," quickly became enmeshed in a household defined by volatility. Within six months, Sarah witnessed her partner "explode," inflicting physical abuse on the children. Sarah soon discovered a history of high-conflict relationships involving the children's fathers - disputes that frequently involved physical violence and knives. Having never experienced such "tumultuous relationships," Sarah lacked the framework to navigate the escalating danger.
As the relationship progressed, the lethality became more apparent. Sarah learned her partner had been arrested for stabbing and strangulation in the past. However, because Sarah knew her partner had been "abused a lot" as a child, she developed a protective, almost sacrificial mindset: "I want to be there for her. I want to stick by her no matter what."
It wasn't long before the violence turned toward Sarah. During one attempt to leave the home to avoid arguing in front of the children, her partner blocked the exit, locked the door, and "choked her out." Despite the gravity of the strangulation, Sarah returned after a few days. Looking back, she carries the heavy weight of self-blame. "I hold a lot of shame because I feel like I knew better," she said. "I stayed because I thought it was love."
Over time, Sarah became "immune" to the constant conflict - a psychological numbing born from chronic stress. The threat was punctuated by an incident in a vehicle where her partner seized Sarah’s 9mm firearm. Sarah, "freaking out," tried to de-escalate by calling the partner’s therapist, leaving a desperate voicemail: "She took my gun. She won't give it to me."
The control extended to digital surveillance; the partner monitored Sarah’s communications via an Apple Watch and exhibited extreme jealousy regarding Sarah’s career. The volatility was so pervasive that the partner even "kicked the ottoman across the room" during a therapy session, leading the counselor to terminate their treatment.
The final escalation was triggered when Sarah was ill with COVID-19 and declined sexual intimacy. Following a heated argument, Sarah left, but when she returned to collect her belongings, her partner began throwing Sarah’s property into the street.
When Sarah returned later that evening to retrieve the rest of her items, she was ambushed in the middle of the street. Her partner jumped from another vehicle and initiated a physical fight. The danger became acute when the partner produced a knife and began popping the tires of Sarah’s car, effectively trapping her.
At 5’2”, Sarah was at a severe physical disadvantage against a partner who stood 5’11” and 240 lbs. Sarah noted that during their fights, her partner had "always been able to reach me before I could reach her." Fearing for her life based on the partner’s history of stabbings and the immediate presence of the knife, Sarah discharged her licensed firearm. She immediately called 911.
Reflecting on the moment that changed her life, Sarah’s voice is clear: "I felt like my life was on the line. What I knew about her—that’s why I thought that my life was in danger."
